Everybody Loves Lane

When my roommate came running into my room earlier demanding that I look at the ESPN homepage, I assumed a Tiger sex-tape was released or the Pistons were about to lose again. Instead, I was greeted with the misfortune of looking at Lane Kiffin's face. It's too often that broadcasters report players who are poisons to teams, but not enough that we hear about coaches who are out of their element. However, the Kiffin situation is unique, and after his two year dive in Oakland, people quickly forgot about the immaturity of the young coach as he was hired at the University of Tennessee. While I would never sit and quote Al Davis, some of his past accusations of Kiffin were certainly valid.

Lets not forget how we were greeted by Kiffin last year either. New to the SEC, Kiffin came out firing at Urban Meyer and the Florida Gators, falsely accusing Meyer of breaking NCAA recruiting regulations. Later, he went on to guarantee wins that he never fulfilled. However, for some reason, the campus took a liking to him and he continued to gain support. Even after going only 7-6, the university and students stuck by the ball coach.

And then...Surprise! Lane Kiffin leaves after one season for USC. Committed recruits are already uncommitted and the school is left coachless. Now Tennessee enters the hiring market late, as most of the preferred hires have already been scooped up by other organizations and universities. And as much as we can all feel sorry for the Vols, it's important to remember that all they needed to do was look to the Oakland Raiders, when they instructed the Vols not to hire Kiffin.

So now we will begin a whole new roller coaster. In the following month we will probably hear how Lane plans to destroy Stanford, shutout Oregon, and other bottomless promises. All the while, Vol fans can remember how they didn't get to sing Rocky Top after getting beat by the Gators.

By the way, when Urban Meyer was asked if he had a comment on Kiffin leaving UT for USC, he responded classy unlike Kiffin and simply said, "No."

Prettyboy Floyd

Dear Floyd "Pretty Boy" Mayweather,

First and foremost, I would like to personally thank you for assuring remaining boxing loyalists that there is no reason to care about the sport anymore. Also, thank you for proving to all of us that your perfect record means nothing more than you like to beat up washed-up fighters (Oscar De La Hoya) and overrated Europeans such as Ricky Hatton.

I must admit, amongst the abundance of press releases in the past months, there was a time that your slander actually lead me to believe that PacMan might have actually been using Performance Enhancing Drugs. However, then I realized that your "Olympic Style" testing and accusations of Pacquiao are completely slanderous. Aside from that fact that PacMan agreed to go beyond Las Vegas standard urine testing, he further tried to meet your needs by agreeing to draw blood three separate times including directly after the fight.

If you are going to go on the record and say, "First and foremost, not only do I want to fight Manny Pacquiao, I want to whip his punk ass," then stop being a coward and realize he has taken every step to meet you on your ridiculous requests. You're scared, and if you aren't, then give boxing one last fight mega-fight to salvage a decaying sport.

Your's Truly.

Mike Posner Live @ U of I (Feb. 5 - High Dive)

Mike Posner is a senior at Duke University. During the week he goes to class and during the weekends he tours. Buy tickets for his show here --> Mike Posner Live @ High Dive

Holy Amanda Bynes

Okay so this blog was going to be strictly sports until I came across a child star from my Nickelodeon days.  I am absolutely speechless. Move over Emma Watson, remember Amanda Bynes?

Colts: Explain Yourself

First and foremost I'd like to send a big Fuck You to Jim Caldwell for single-handedly ending my fantasy season. Although my opponent started Peyton Manning, by taking Manning out of the game he essentially ended both Dallas Clark and Austin Collies games, thus my hopes of a fantasy championship two weeks ago.

However, stepping back and not looking at the Colts as a fantasy-football player manufacturer, I tried to understand their position in benching their players and ending their perfect season. I understand that if Manning were to get hurt it would have gone down as the biggest mistake in Colts history, but I also understand that Manning gets sacked less than almost any quarterback in the National Football League. Still, I tried to understand their decision as they wanted their players fresh for the playoffs.

My issue with the Colts comes in their game last week against the Buffalo Bills. If management is really going to take the stance that they want to keep their players healthy and deprive fans of what they buy tickets for, then why are they worried about players reaching season milestones to achieve bonuses in their contracts. Is the Colts administration the biggest morons in the NFL or did they feel bad that they stripped Manning and his gang of the thing they wanted most. Either way, I will never understand how the administration would want Maning throwing negative-six yard passes to Dallas Clark in the flats for him to achieve his 100 reception milestone and then pull him out of the game. Basically, Colts management doesn't want to be legends and receive millions as an organization in endorsements BUT the Colts management would rather allow their players to achieve single-season milestones and risk them getting hurt so they can pay out more money. Oh the Irony. Mercury Morris, you can now pleasure yourself.

As a Chargers fan I would really like to see this whole situation blow up in the Colts face. However, I will say that I think the Colts will still go on to win the AFC, The Superbowl, and one day Manning will retire as the best quarterback to ever play the game.

Agent Zero

"Gilbert Arenas should have his contract terminated and be denied unemployment." -Ben Steele


Mike Vick, Plaxico Burress, and now Gilbert Arenas. As an outsider and someone who could care less if Washington even had a profesional team, I applaud David Stern on indefinitely suspending Gilbert Arenas today. Gilbert Arenas has recently become just another spoiled athlete who has overstepped his boundaries thinking he is above the law. This time, rather than following others and promoting dog-fighting, or shooting himself in the leg, GIlbert Arenas thought there was nothing wrong with bringing guns into an NBA locker room. While rumors have circulated that the guns were brought in over a gambling controversy, Arenas claims that he simply did not want the guns in his home anymore.

Unfortunately, now we will all have to sit through the media whirlwind as Gilbert's, "Road to Redemption" begins. I'll be the first to say I don't care, and I'd rather hear more about Brett Favre or Tiger Woods. Besides that the NBA represents the shit stain of professional organizations, no one cares about what happens to a Washington Wizards talented athlete aside from his family, friends, and fantasy owners. At this point I am calling for David Stern to set his example on Arenas, law-officials to punish him promptly, and hopefully we won't have to hear about this nuisance for the next two months.

With that said I will leave you with the words of a true American athlete. "If you don't love it, leave it, USA, #1" - Ricky Stanzi